What Women Want?

Baubles and bangles, diamonds and pearls -
Are these the things that attract the girls?
Wined and dined with candlelit meals?
Out on the town in a flash set of wheels?
I guess that’s ok if you want to impress
The Essex girl in her little black dress,
But we’re not all the same, not ‘one size fits all’
What about those who don’t wanna play ball?
Some of us girls want a little bit more
Than your average flash Harry, abrasive bore.
We don’t all crave to be loved and adored
Some of us girls are more self assured.
We don’t dream of swapping wedding rings,
And we don’t need some bloke clipping our wings.
We want independence, we want our own life,
We want to be more than just someone’s wife.
Or a trophy to show off whenever it suits
For some arrogant twat, too big for his boots.
We’re not desperate, we have our own minds
And we’re in no rush for a tie that binds.
You can keep your smooth talk, your tongue that flatters
Just be straight with us, that’s all that matters.
Be who you are, no airs and no graces
And try lifting your heads and talk to our faces.
Though your eyes may be drawn to our tits and our arses
We’re really not flattered by your drunken passes.
By your crass wolf whistles, your brash cat calls,
No thanks very much, we want blokes who’ve got balls.
A man who can make us all laugh ourselves silly,
Who thinks with his head and not with his willy.
A man who’s honest, a man who is straight,
Who can talk to us just like he’d talk to a mate.
But who knows what we want, who knows how to please,
Who knows how to flirt and who knows how to tease.
Who knows how we tick and what buttons to press,
Who knows foreplay’s more than undoing our dress.
Coz men and women, like a hand and a glove
Aren’t really that different when push comes to shove.
So it’s not a tall order, not too much to ask -
Trouble is no man seems up to the task!!